The scenery today is a glistening orb of amber. I say it's amber because it just rained, meaning that the sky is full of clouds. But there is a thin enough layer that the sun can peep out, casting an amber light over everything. When I walked downstairs and saw it for the first time, it almost seemed like a completely new world.
I have thought for a long time that I would really like to blog more. I put the website back on private, because I feel like I can type more freely if I know that only people I allow can see in to this side of the web.
Well anyways, I would love it if I blogged more. The world makes more sense to me if I can jot it down on paper or, in this case, virtual paper. If only I could find the time to sit down with my little Net Book that is currently the same purple as the pants I'm wearing (and my bed sheets and my wall! How strange is that? I hadn't even intended it). But alas, the life of a high school student leaves very little time to get your own stuff done. But that doesn't mean your whole life should be consumed by school work and lessons and community service and all that other stuff the guidance counselors tell you that colleges look for. For instance, right now, I am embarking on a journey of activities after school that I have never done before but thought I would enjoy. About two weeks ago, though it seems longer, I joined the school's Dance Team. A group of dancers are organized to perform during the Turkey Day pep rally and the Turkey Day football game. The people that get to dance in the pep rally are the better of the girls, since not all of us can fit onto the platform. And guess what? I GOT CHOSEN! It's amazing, really, because I'm not even a dancer (if you define a dancer as someone that has taken lessons and has lots of experience). The only time I have ever danced is this one year I did hip hop, but didn't enjoy it quite as much as I'd wanted to. And that was back in elementary school or early middle school. But me? on the advanced team?!?! I have been told that I really have a talent, which is good, because it's lots of fun.
Oh yeah, there was a second thing. Well, I also joined a play. We haven't really gotten started; we are going to do a read-through of the script late this afternoon. I found out about the audition the morning of, walked down there after dance rehearsal, read the part I was asked to read, and sang what they told me to sing. We did various scenes. It feels really strange to audition, I must say. But apparently I did well there too. I never thought that I had a lot of talents, other than being a musician of percussion and piano. I really thought that was where my talents lay. But now I come to find out that I have a lot more to offer.
What I'm ultimately hoping will happen is that as I get more comfortable with more people in my school, the younger grades not included, then I feel that I might just come out of my shell a little more. So many of my friends are able to do that, just let go of their inhibitions and go crazy! I really want to be able to do that. I do my best, but I feel very awkward. The first step, as far as I see it, before I can feel confident in the face of others, is to feel my best about myself. I want to feel healthy, look good, be amazing and awesome and the best person on the face of the earth. Well, I may have trailed off on that a little bit, but you can see my point, I'm sure.
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