Hello Fellow Readers,
How art thou this February vacation? This time last year, I was off on vacation in Orlando, Florida. I remember bits and pieces of the vacation. I remember it was a nice chance to get away from the everyday life of Hudson. But oh my gosh, I would never want to be in Florida over the summer, I hear it's insufferable! (that means bad, right?)
This year, however, will be spent relaxing between my house and my grandparents house. I can feel the upcoming spring season in the air, even though there is still a chilly breeze that forces me to wear my winter jacket.
My new semester at school is taking a while to adjust to. Even though physics and geometry were difficult classes, especially together, I still miss the familiarity of seeing my teachers every day. Now, my only similar classes are english/civics and band. My lunch is even at a different time. They expect me to eat a meal at 10:30 A.M.!
There are a lot of flaws in the school's schedule system. For example, this semester has been like starting the school year over completely. Plus, my physics state assessment (or MCAS) doesn't even start until June, even though I've completed the class. That, my dear friends, is why they have decided to change the schedule. I hear they are planning on a 7 day rotation with 5 blocks each day. The classes are 70 minutes long, rather than our standard 90 minutes. The main downfall I see is that we will have to put up with a different lunch every day.
There was a student survey so we could put in our input. But most of us didn't even know about it! There was no mention of it in our daily morning announcements, and the teachers didn't tell us anything either. Perhaps it really was there all along and I just failed to notice it. That sounds like something I'd do.
For once, I had a day of school that really felt like a party. In my French class, we actually did have a party, which I prepared my famous cheesecakes for. In my last block of the day, Band, we watched This Is It, that Michael Jackson movie. I only had to work in my classes before lunch (although we did have to speak French to ask for food, or we didn't get any).
I can't wait until a friend asks me to hang out, because frankly, I'm getting a little bored not hearing from anybody. At least text me! Yes, that means you. You know who you are, you friend of mine. I would just like a conversation, it doesn't even have to include future plans to hang out. I'm gonna be at my grandparents until at least Thursday anyway.
Until then,
Au revoir, mon amies! a plus tard, a demain et tout a l'heur et au revoir (ha, now you have that song stuck in your head).
Monday, February 20, 2012
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Not This Week
Christmas has gone and past. I know it has been quite a while since my last entry, but that is not uncommon for me to pick up on something weeks after beginning it. I like to be spontaneous and do whatever feels right in the moment. Not that it works out that way a lot of times.
With school and everything in my life, there doesn't seem to be a lot of room to move around and just be me. I read in this book that man has somewhat forgotten that we used to do things for the pleasure of doing them. We have since grown to do things because we think they will be useful and better for survival, or God forbid, we should become extinct. So you see, we must get back into the balance of doing things for ourselves. Not necessarily one on one, you against the world, but doing things for the purpose of having fun, or being proud.
I can see that this week is going to be difficult for me. I didn't think that I would be affected so much, but even though it has been a whole year, I do not think I am going to take it well. January 7 this year falls on this upcoming Saturday (which reminds me, Happy New Year!). At least I will be home for the event. Maybe I will even sleep through it if I'm lucky. I cannot bring myself to relinquish the past and move on. I am once again weary with the idea of even getting up in the morning, a dilemma I faced not so long ago. I do not like these morbid entries, but sometimes they must be done, to get it out into the open and to release it from myself.
I do not know how many of my invites actually even bother reading these. I don't really care. I enjoy the prospect of writing for a bigger audience. In a journal, it's all private unless you give it to someone. Even then, they aren't interested unless each entry contains a clue to this great unknown treasure. Still, it would be nice to get a head count so I know this isn't a complete waste.
I could always get rid of the privacy setting and let the whole world view this, but that does not sit with me well. My thoughts are my own and for the few people that I have chosen to share them with.
I wish I could bring a happier delight into these one sided conversations, but alas, I do not think I can. Not this week.
Perhaps next week I can shed a little light on the subject..
With school and everything in my life, there doesn't seem to be a lot of room to move around and just be me. I read in this book that man has somewhat forgotten that we used to do things for the pleasure of doing them. We have since grown to do things because we think they will be useful and better for survival, or God forbid, we should become extinct. So you see, we must get back into the balance of doing things for ourselves. Not necessarily one on one, you against the world, but doing things for the purpose of having fun, or being proud.
I can see that this week is going to be difficult for me. I didn't think that I would be affected so much, but even though it has been a whole year, I do not think I am going to take it well. January 7 this year falls on this upcoming Saturday (which reminds me, Happy New Year!). At least I will be home for the event. Maybe I will even sleep through it if I'm lucky. I cannot bring myself to relinquish the past and move on. I am once again weary with the idea of even getting up in the morning, a dilemma I faced not so long ago. I do not like these morbid entries, but sometimes they must be done, to get it out into the open and to release it from myself.
I do not know how many of my invites actually even bother reading these. I don't really care. I enjoy the prospect of writing for a bigger audience. In a journal, it's all private unless you give it to someone. Even then, they aren't interested unless each entry contains a clue to this great unknown treasure. Still, it would be nice to get a head count so I know this isn't a complete waste.
I could always get rid of the privacy setting and let the whole world view this, but that does not sit with me well. My thoughts are my own and for the few people that I have chosen to share them with.
I wish I could bring a happier delight into these one sided conversations, but alas, I do not think I can. Not this week.
Perhaps next week I can shed a little light on the subject..
Monday, November 28, 2011
Thanksgiving has ended. The preparations for Christmas are under way. The radio began its jingles long ago, though there certainly is no sign of snow. With the warm weather we have been receiving, it doesn't seem likely that snow will enter our realms of Massachusetts any time soon. I've recently gotten into this television series on Netflix. My friend's dad showed it to her, thus bringing it to me. After 10 episodes, the show was cancelled, but so far I can't see why. The show is known as The Nine Lives of Chloe King. I shan't give anything away, since it is really that interesting. You can find it on Netflix or Hulu. For some reason, my Netflix connection is wavering, and doesn't give us a very good quality, which is a shame since they don't ever air commercials.
Homework is surprisingly manageable. It was only a few weeks ago that I was feeling pressured to do my homework and get a solid grade on it, or even just to come up with something that would make enough sense. Now, I am proudly procrastinating and feeling relaxed about it. It's OK, I know that I will get the work done and well. In my English class, we have been reading this book called A Separate Peace by John Knowles. I love it even though I am just beginning chapter 5. It's got to do with a boys' boarding school during the time of WWII. They live in New Hampshire, so they are not in the middle of all the war action. You should really check it out. I enjoy the way my teacher asks us to analyze a few of the scenes, since I usually have a lot of ideas behind them, but I think she goes a bit too far with the meanings behind things. If two boys went swimming, and one of them almost drowned, she would ask us what the water represents. Could it at all be possible that these boys just wanted to go for a swim? While we are allowed to voice our thoughts, I do not feel that they are always appreciated.
It would feel as though I have great revelations when I am writing. Sometimes my fingers just want to type certain words and I feel too lazy to press the backspace button, so I just let it be, and other times I just feel so clear minded and free to say whatever comes to mind. My own little journal that you are all welcome to read. I never said that this would be a daily thing, since I knew that I would not be able to uphold that responsibility. I did hear that the homework level stays pretty much the same, which was a relief to discover.
Either tomorrow, Wednesday, or on December 6 (the morning announcements versus the school website are very contradictory) there is a sign language club, specifically to learn sign language. I believe I wrote an article on how sign language would be something that I would love to learn, and now I can finally begin! Whether or not any of my friends join, I'm going to do it. It is too great an opportunity to pass up!
It's articles like these that hold too much information for a title to be added. My mind does not hold thoughts within categories, so I don't think my writing should be too organized. I do congratulate you on reading this far, you must be very interested, or very bored, either way, it's great!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Literature and the Endless Boundaries
I have just succeeded in completing the book series known as Warriors (again). Written by Erin Hunter, it has become my favorite book series, and I have found a lot of great books out there.
The world of literature is great as it is vast, filling you with emotions, love, and understanding beyond any realms of depth that you have ever experienced before.
After reading through all those action novels that I love so dearly, it makes me wonder if our lives have more to offer. Perhaps, if we choose, we too can go on great missions and explore forests that go farther than our territories. If life truly is what we create it to be, then why not make it such? It really is fun and interesting to think about.
I feel as though I am nearing an end. Not a loss of any kind, but more of a closing, like the change in a chapter of a book or a movie. In the same moment, I can feel greatness in what is to come. I am free to do as I please, and with that knowledge comes determination and confidence. It feels so glorious and wonderful, you should give it a try!
My brother Taylor is really coming along with his album. Did I mention that he is writing the music for my high school's production of The Tempest? I sure hope I did, because I am extremely proud of him. Perhaps some people would think it my instinct to feel jealous of him, seeing as his skills have given him popularity at my school. He is a wonderful musician, and the most I can say I feel for him, more than anything else, is pride. I, too, can play the piano. I'm sure I could become better and more motivated if I wished that to be my destiny. However, as much as I do enjoy playing the piano and music in general, with the power that comes when the dynamics are hit perfectly, I don't really see myself pursuing it much further than that. That could still change, mind you, but that is how I feel right now.
No one can possibly understand the bond a sister feels for her brothers unless they have gone through it themselves. If anyone were to do anything cruel or upsetting towards them, I would instantly feel the need to confront them and rip their throats out.
Okay, so maybe I don't know how to rip anyone's throat out, but I would resent them for sure. I am not unjust when I make these decisions. I do not hate what they do, but more the way that it is done.
But back to my original point. I really love books. I have learned a lot of my vocabulary and understanding of life through them. It is how I come to understand so many of people's actions. Perhaps it is why I see in terms of color. For instance, the number 17 is green with a hint of deep blue. 16 is red. Ask me of any word, number, or letter of the alphabet, and I can tell you what color it's in. Kinda weird, huh?
It is with you now that I will close this entry. Until next time.
The world of literature is great as it is vast, filling you with emotions, love, and understanding beyond any realms of depth that you have ever experienced before.
After reading through all those action novels that I love so dearly, it makes me wonder if our lives have more to offer. Perhaps, if we choose, we too can go on great missions and explore forests that go farther than our territories. If life truly is what we create it to be, then why not make it such? It really is fun and interesting to think about.
I feel as though I am nearing an end. Not a loss of any kind, but more of a closing, like the change in a chapter of a book or a movie. In the same moment, I can feel greatness in what is to come. I am free to do as I please, and with that knowledge comes determination and confidence. It feels so glorious and wonderful, you should give it a try!
My brother Taylor is really coming along with his album. Did I mention that he is writing the music for my high school's production of The Tempest? I sure hope I did, because I am extremely proud of him. Perhaps some people would think it my instinct to feel jealous of him, seeing as his skills have given him popularity at my school. He is a wonderful musician, and the most I can say I feel for him, more than anything else, is pride. I, too, can play the piano. I'm sure I could become better and more motivated if I wished that to be my destiny. However, as much as I do enjoy playing the piano and music in general, with the power that comes when the dynamics are hit perfectly, I don't really see myself pursuing it much further than that. That could still change, mind you, but that is how I feel right now.
No one can possibly understand the bond a sister feels for her brothers unless they have gone through it themselves. If anyone were to do anything cruel or upsetting towards them, I would instantly feel the need to confront them and rip their throats out.
Okay, so maybe I don't know how to rip anyone's throat out, but I would resent them for sure. I am not unjust when I make these decisions. I do not hate what they do, but more the way that it is done.
But back to my original point. I really love books. I have learned a lot of my vocabulary and understanding of life through them. It is how I come to understand so many of people's actions. Perhaps it is why I see in terms of color. For instance, the number 17 is green with a hint of deep blue. 16 is red. Ask me of any word, number, or letter of the alphabet, and I can tell you what color it's in. Kinda weird, huh?
It is with you now that I will close this entry. Until next time.
Monday, October 31, 2011
The Ghost In Our Piano
I have been working on this song on the piano for Halloween and it came with lyrics! I thought it was a cute song, so I'm gonna post them here. Enjoy!
Someone is playing a song
But something is terribly wrong
There's nobody here
So I sadly fear
It's the ghost
In our piano
It's happened two times before
But now he's come back here for more
I don't want him 'round
That's one scary sound
When he plays
On our piano
I wish he'd just go away
And never come back here to play
He should go back home
Where he's all alone
And play
His OWN piano
I like it very much. It sounds a lot cooler with the piano accompaniment. I was hoping to play it tomorrow for my friends on Halloween, but it seems that I won't be near a piano unless we start at my house, which I don't see happening.
With all the snow I mentioned yesterday, the school day has been canceled for tomorrow. I'm relieved, to be honest. Recently, I have been working on a research paper about Adolf Eichmann, who was a big contributor to the Holocaust. I had to write an outline with six body paragraphs by tomorrow, and it didn't seem I was going to make it. Perfect time to get writer's block, isn't it? But now, perhaps my mind will be clear enough to come up with something substantial.
I was kinda hoping that I would get to show off my costume to fellow students tomorrow, but I'm alright with what happens. I have decided that I will try not to push against things so much. If I'm feeling sad about something that is happening, like snow in October, then I should tell myself that whatever happens, I am still going to have lots of fun. For example, since it has snowed and we now have a very limited time to go trick or treating, I have decided that it's okay, since I will be with three good friends and we now have more time to hang out afterwards!
Someone is playing a song
But something is terribly wrong
There's nobody here
So I sadly fear
It's the ghost
In our piano
It's happened two times before
But now he's come back here for more
I don't want him 'round
That's one scary sound
When he plays
On our piano
I wish he'd just go away
And never come back here to play
He should go back home
Where he's all alone
And play
His OWN piano
I like it very much. It sounds a lot cooler with the piano accompaniment. I was hoping to play it tomorrow for my friends on Halloween, but it seems that I won't be near a piano unless we start at my house, which I don't see happening.
With all the snow I mentioned yesterday, the school day has been canceled for tomorrow. I'm relieved, to be honest. Recently, I have been working on a research paper about Adolf Eichmann, who was a big contributor to the Holocaust. I had to write an outline with six body paragraphs by tomorrow, and it didn't seem I was going to make it. Perfect time to get writer's block, isn't it? But now, perhaps my mind will be clear enough to come up with something substantial.
I was kinda hoping that I would get to show off my costume to fellow students tomorrow, but I'm alright with what happens. I have decided that I will try not to push against things so much. If I'm feeling sad about something that is happening, like snow in October, then I should tell myself that whatever happens, I am still going to have lots of fun. For example, since it has snowed and we now have a very limited time to go trick or treating, I have decided that it's okay, since I will be with three good friends and we now have more time to hang out afterwards!
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Walking In a Winter Wonderland
You may not be able to believe this--unless you live near me--but it is snowing outside! That's right, that's no typo, I do mean SNOWING!! It's exciting, but at the same time worrisome, considering that it is the weekend before Halloween. I was really looking forward to trick-or-treating. I got the feeling that this would be the last year I got to walk around and ask for free candy before I got too old. How did that even get started?
I know that Halloween was a day that originally meant that the spirits would come out, so people would dress up as ghosts to scare them off. I'm not sure how the candy got involved. Perhaps they had festivals or something, I don't know for sure.
My friend Sara and her family put up grand decorations for Halloween. The last year I was there, there was a fog machine setup, some crazy strobe lights, and a projection that said "Happy Halloween" and showed some slide shows. It was really cool. I have plans to go over her house along with two other friends, Anna and Evelyn. We were then thinking what we could do if it was raining, or if the snow was too thick, and we decided to go to my other friend, Anna's house and just party it up over there. The costumes would still be worn of course. My brother had plans to just to to a party, but it turns out that they will be doing some trick-or-treating too apparently.
Halloween this year will land on a Monday unfortunately, which means we will be waking up early and going to bed late. Not the best combination. I don't really care, since I'm sure I will have a blast. Before all the snow started falling, I decided that whether or not the storm did end up arriving, I would just enjoy whatever happened. Knowing that we have a Halloween backup plan helps too. It feels so much better to sit back and accept what happens rather than push against something that ends up happening anyway. I know the harder you push against something, the more you are bringing it to your attention, and therefore allowing it to be created. The same goes for you wanting something. The more you want and picture yourself with the success that comes with the desire, the faster it will come. We are never content, and we are not meant to be. That's most of the fun. Always wanting and desiring, and then relishing in the joy when we feel content enough to just drift off down the lake.
I should really explain that metaphor.
Imagine that you are rowing in a boat. It's just you and the quiet lake. You are rowing against the current, harder, and your progress is really slow. Then, maybe out of exhaustion or just curiosity, you let go of the oars, lay back, and softly drift down the current. It feels nicer, easier. It feels good, and you are content, with no plans to meet and no reason to begin going against the current again.
I want you to go over that paragraph, and just sit back and imagine the scenario. Imagine how relaxed you should feel when you finally let go of the oars. Feels good, doesn't it?
Yep, that's how I felt when I was feeling stressed and my mom told me that story. I felt wonderful, like there was nothing that I needed to do. I could just sit back and be exactly where I needed to be. That's what life is like. You are always right where you need to be based on where you want to go. The timing couldn't be more perfect.
I shall leave you with that wonderful picture until next time.
I know that Halloween was a day that originally meant that the spirits would come out, so people would dress up as ghosts to scare them off. I'm not sure how the candy got involved. Perhaps they had festivals or something, I don't know for sure.
My friend Sara and her family put up grand decorations for Halloween. The last year I was there, there was a fog machine setup, some crazy strobe lights, and a projection that said "Happy Halloween" and showed some slide shows. It was really cool. I have plans to go over her house along with two other friends, Anna and Evelyn. We were then thinking what we could do if it was raining, or if the snow was too thick, and we decided to go to my other friend, Anna's house and just party it up over there. The costumes would still be worn of course. My brother had plans to just to to a party, but it turns out that they will be doing some trick-or-treating too apparently.
Halloween this year will land on a Monday unfortunately, which means we will be waking up early and going to bed late. Not the best combination. I don't really care, since I'm sure I will have a blast. Before all the snow started falling, I decided that whether or not the storm did end up arriving, I would just enjoy whatever happened. Knowing that we have a Halloween backup plan helps too. It feels so much better to sit back and accept what happens rather than push against something that ends up happening anyway. I know the harder you push against something, the more you are bringing it to your attention, and therefore allowing it to be created. The same goes for you wanting something. The more you want and picture yourself with the success that comes with the desire, the faster it will come. We are never content, and we are not meant to be. That's most of the fun. Always wanting and desiring, and then relishing in the joy when we feel content enough to just drift off down the lake.
I should really explain that metaphor.
Imagine that you are rowing in a boat. It's just you and the quiet lake. You are rowing against the current, harder, and your progress is really slow. Then, maybe out of exhaustion or just curiosity, you let go of the oars, lay back, and softly drift down the current. It feels nicer, easier. It feels good, and you are content, with no plans to meet and no reason to begin going against the current again.
I want you to go over that paragraph, and just sit back and imagine the scenario. Imagine how relaxed you should feel when you finally let go of the oars. Feels good, doesn't it?
Yep, that's how I felt when I was feeling stressed and my mom told me that story. I felt wonderful, like there was nothing that I needed to do. I could just sit back and be exactly where I needed to be. That's what life is like. You are always right where you need to be based on where you want to go. The timing couldn't be more perfect.
I shall leave you with that wonderful picture until next time.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Concerts and Other Thoughts
So I now know that it is very possible to be in contact with the Nonphysical. Now all I would like to know is this: how?? I have had some dreams that have included Mom, but she was always sort of distant. Except for this one. She came up and pretty much startled me by coming right up to my face, turning, and then petting Willow (my cat). That section of the dream consisted of us sitting in the living room just enjoying the moment. The TV wasn't on, and Willow was the center of attention, which is just the way she likes it.
I have recently found that my dreams relate to what I was thinking about before I fell asleep. Like, if I had just been reading a book, then I would have a dream that I was part of the book. I had another instance where that happened, but I forgot what it was.
I have felt so much better just knowing that it is possible to be in communication with her. So, if that article in my last blog says that they can contact us as easily as they could when they were in physical bodies, then wouldn't it be as simple as writing a note and getting a response? I have no idea. Maybe there is some sort of ritual. All I know right now is that it is possible, and I'm going try whatever I can think of to get back in contact with my mom!
Tomorrow is Columbus Day, so naturally, we don't have any school, making this a long weekend. So what else would I be doing on a free day? Going to a concert, of course!
Specifically, a Dream Theater concert!
Dream Theater is one of my favorite bands. Their music is so unlike anything else that I have ever heard. They just released a new album called A Dramatic Turn of Events. Their previous drummer left the band due to scheduling conflicts, and their new drummer is now Mike Mangini, who just so happens to be my drum teachers past instructor when he went to Berklee. It is so cool that I have a connection to someone who has broken record for consecutive beats per second. This guy can drum roll with one hand! ONE HAND!!! I don't think I could ever do that! Mangini has officially pushed past everyone and is now #1 in my "Favorite Drummers" list. I would tell you who is in 2nd place, but I forgot how to spell his last name, and I don't want to spell it wrong.
I should get some sleep now, since the concert will go pretty late.
C'ya!
I have recently found that my dreams relate to what I was thinking about before I fell asleep. Like, if I had just been reading a book, then I would have a dream that I was part of the book. I had another instance where that happened, but I forgot what it was.
I have felt so much better just knowing that it is possible to be in communication with her. So, if that article in my last blog says that they can contact us as easily as they could when they were in physical bodies, then wouldn't it be as simple as writing a note and getting a response? I have no idea. Maybe there is some sort of ritual. All I know right now is that it is possible, and I'm going try whatever I can think of to get back in contact with my mom!
Tomorrow is Columbus Day, so naturally, we don't have any school, making this a long weekend. So what else would I be doing on a free day? Going to a concert, of course!
Specifically, a Dream Theater concert!
Dream Theater is one of my favorite bands. Their music is so unlike anything else that I have ever heard. They just released a new album called A Dramatic Turn of Events. Their previous drummer left the band due to scheduling conflicts, and their new drummer is now Mike Mangini, who just so happens to be my drum teachers past instructor when he went to Berklee. It is so cool that I have a connection to someone who has broken record for consecutive beats per second. This guy can drum roll with one hand! ONE HAND!!! I don't think I could ever do that! Mangini has officially pushed past everyone and is now #1 in my "Favorite Drummers" list. I would tell you who is in 2nd place, but I forgot how to spell his last name, and I don't want to spell it wrong.
I should get some sleep now, since the concert will go pretty late.
C'ya!
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